Slow but sure: Conversion of my semi-anti wife

Tiktock

Tiktock

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Hello,
I just thought I'd put this out there as I am sure others have a similar situation. My wife was raised in a fully anti household. All the usual rhetoric had been spewed upon her for her first 25 years of life...guns=evil, guns=dangerous, etc etc.

She is a very smart woman, and remarkably tolerant given her brainwashing as a child. She tolerated my guns and my interests, but in a "don't ask dont tell" sort of way. If i didnt show her the guns and they werent laying around the house, she didn't care about them...but she didnt really want to hear about them either. My only real gripe was that she didn't really want loaded guns in the main house, something i saw as a safety issue since I insisted on having something for SD in our bedroom.

My reaction in the beginning was "Good enough for me" since it meant I could pursue my hobby. In the back of my head I put into motion a long term plan to convert her. I began by taking a few of our friends shooting, culminating with me taking her best female frined shooting a few months ago, who LOVED it.

All along ive offered to take my wife shooting but she simply said "not interested" and I respected that knowing that forcing something on a woman is the last way to get it to happen.

Fast forward to last night. I was sitting watching TV, creating a new case for my M&P9c by using that pick-foam. When I finished she remarked how good a job the case looked and out of the blue said "you should keep that in the bedroom." My jaw nearly dropped and internally I laughed, since the gun had been in my clothes drawer in the bedroom for the past two years...out of sight and out of mind.

To follow up that shocking statement, she asked to hold the pistol and said "You know, sometime this summer i'll come to the range with you..." Being the smart husband, I didnt jump all over this and simply said "yeah i bet once you shoot once, all your misconceptions about guns will wash away" and dropped the subject.

I thought I'd just post this to show that given enough time and by setting an example of compromise and demonstrated safety, even someone born into an anti household can be converted. All it took was patience, planting the seeds of saftey and self defense, and a few of her friends coming home with their targets, giggling and smiling.
 
awesome, man! Every one we can bring to our side the the better! Obviously she'll love it when she goes shooting, and it looks like your slow but sure approach has paid dividends and laid a solid foundation. When you do take her to the range, stress safety with her to the point of being annoying, so that she sees that you make an automatic and very tangible association between guns and safety.
 
Good on you. You're playing it perfectly. I've found that if you try to shove someone into the sport and hound them to come shooting, they get nervous about it. Ease them in slowly. Stress safety above all else. Start them off with a .22.

Before you know it she'll want her own pistola! [grin]
 
sounds like my girlfriend (who i took out for the first time yesterday).

she wasn't too hot on the idea even after shooting but i think in time she will warm up and with practice she may very well be able to out-shoot me. when i asked her what specifically she was uncomfortable with when it came to the guns our conversation went like this:

"so what is still bothering you about guns?"

"they are dangerous."

"yes, but only in the hands of someone who isn't safe with them or who is intend on causing harm with them. the same could be said for a power tool or a pencil. safety is key here and no one will ever get hurt by a gun handled by someone who is following all safety procedures."

"i suppose."

"did anyone get hurt today? did you hurt anyone when you were shooting?"

"no..."

the more experience she gets with them i think the more she will warm up to them. she's afraid because she doesn't understand them. she loves archery though and arrows can kill just as good and fast as a firearm--she just knows how that works.

getting your foot in the door or getting them to the range for the first time is where it all starts. the thing that changed her mind was actually how nice everyone was at first defense firearms and how nice everyone in the store was. i've been telling her for months that gun owners are the nicest people you will meet, when she finally saw that gun owners are people too with husbands, wives, children, pets, etc. i think it really helped the cause. i lucked out twice in that respect in that i got some range time with my girlfriend just because i went to buy an AR upper! [grin]
 
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Thanks for sharing, I'm in a similar situation, my gf is very anti, however our friends are very interested and constantly ask me to take them with me. I just bought a P22 in the hopes someday she will ask to go as well!
 
Just be careful, before you know it you'll be in the poor house because shes shooting all your ammo and you need to buy more.

I guess there are worse things than that. [smile]
 
I think the key thing to remember is that your goal is to make her feel like she's missing out on something fun/interesting rather than trying to convince her its fun/interesting. If you try to talk her into it, shes gonna shut down to the same degree. If instead the "idea" comes from her, its much easier. The hard part is laying out the foundation and situation that finally makes her curiousity get the best of her!
 
thats awesome!

i had similar luck this weekend. my fiance is an anti as well...she is fine with me having guns, but wont touch them, look at them, or talk about them. i have asked her if she would like to come with me everytime i go to the range, i get a simple "no thanks" and i drop it right there and go to not be pushy. she went with me this weekend to "shut me up".

had her shoot my CZ452 .22 rifle. first 5 shots at 25 yards she hit the bullseye and put all 5 within an inch. her face lit up, it was priceless. then we were picking off clays at 100 yards and she was taking them out without missing. although she got bored after about 30-45 min (we were going over loading the gun and safety and whatnot) she said if we could do some type of competition she would have fun with that.

took her to the pistol range to shoot my M&P9...two shots and she looked at me, shook her head no, and handed me the pistol lol

in my book, that is a win for me :) as i enjoyed her coming with me. and maybe even an excuse to get a .22 pistol, so 'she' will enjoy shooting it hahaha
 
Sign her and a couple of her friends up for a Women on Target Event. My wife had gone to the range with me a few times. After the W.O.T. she got her license.

As for the be careful what you wish for... My wife wanted to go the range on Sunday. On Saturday, I said sure we can go, if you help me with quality control on the reloading. She tested ~250 rounds of 9mm in the case gauge while I was reloading them! I'm still trying to convince her to load the primers into the tubes for me.
 
It does take a while. My girlfriend was none too keen on the gun thing when I first started getting involved. I started off slow - just getting a pistol. And right from the outset she stated numerous times she did not want any rifles like the AR in the house. (black rifles). Well over the last few years I have brought home a number of rifles and pistols. Most of which she did not know about. They always went into the safe and she never bothered to look. Back about 8 months or so ago she caught a look in my safe when I had it open one night to look a couple of things over - and she made the comment: "for crying out loud - you have a freaking arsenal in there".

She worries about money - so I told her that much of the stuff I bought was bought very carefully at decent prices and so far everything I have has either kept value - or gained value. I use the example of the Swiss K31's I have which were purchased at $179.00 and are now selling in the $289.00 range. So she walks away thinking that at least I am not peeing money down the drain.

The coming of Obama has also helped immensely I believe. I have been sending out news stories as my own little personal campaign to change people's minds. Many of these stories were about the Obama gun buying spree. She also has a brother who is in the Navy and is stationed down in SC. After Obama was elected the idea of him implementing his "civilian police corps" freaked her out. And her brother made comments about that when they talked , he said: "down here if they try to pull that - those guys will just get shot". So she has had a bit of education over the last 8 months or so and has definitely had an attitude change.

So over the weekend I had my Robinson XCR out and I was sitting in a chair in the kitchen installing a new stock on it. She walked by a number of times and asked what I was doing and I told her that I was trying to get the stock on because I wanted to go out shooting the next day. She didn't comment on the gun she didn't even know I owned - and she didn't comment on the fact that I had a "evil black rifle" which she had previously insisted she didn't want in the house.

Apparently the indoctrination is working.
 
in regards to the evil black rifles i actually had my girlfriend saying "those are stupid laws" when i was explaining the MA AWB law.

i also heard the arsenal comment. usually after i mention i took gun X to the range she'll say to me:

"when did you get gun X?! how many guns do you own?"

[laugh]
 
atilla said:
in regards to the evil black rifles i actually had my girlfriend saying "those are stupid laws" when i was explaining the MA AWB law.

i also heard the arsenal comment. usually after i mention i took gun X to the range she'll say to me:

"when did you get gun X?! how many guns do you own?"

[laugh]
Click to expand...

These are my answers to those questions...

"Uhh, I had that one for awhile."

"Not Enough"

[laugh]
 
wow if my gf found a safe full of guns she didnt know i owned, i would be in the yard piecing together my nuts that she had fed to the chipper
 
atilla said:
in regards to the evil black rifles i actually had my girlfriend saying "those are stupid laws" when i was explaining the MA AWB law.
Click to expand...

I get this reaction over and over. "Wait, so if they were made prior to 1994 they're fine?" "What's the difference between a flash hider and a muzzle brake?" etc etc

Aside: I misread the title as 'converting my semi-auto wife'. I'm not sure what that means, but it sounds cool.
 
I can't really tell you how it all happened on our end. droppin' Shells (Shell) is my girlfriend who loves firearms just as much as I do now. She grew up in an anti house and she could probably tell you more of how she got interested. I've seemed to lost that transition in my mind because it's all great now and I don't have to worry about that. However, she's not a big fan of long arms, more of a fan of pocket guns... but I let her shoot the Gamo Bigcat 1200 pellet gun saturday... I smell a new conversion and love for long arms (maybe EBRs?).
 
I guess I have it good. my fiance didn't have to be converted, just exposed. her whole family is like that it seems... all just slightly on the anti side due to not really caring, and all are now firmly on the pro side after learning some.

when I brought home a new SKS a few months ago she thought it was the coolest thing because it has a bayonet on it.

she's given me the "we need a bigger safe" statement.

I love her.
 
"All along ive offered to take my wife shooting but she simply said "not interested" and I respected that knowing that forcing something on a woman is the last way to get it to happen."Tiktock;822711

Being a woman myself, not yet a wife... it is true...like anyone...if pressured or pushed it won't happen it has to be natural and it has to be a choice. you can b*t*h at a drunk all day long to drop the bottle but if he decides he's still parched and not ready...it's pointless.

Congrats though Tiktock, I hope it continues to work its self out and she joins you this summer at the range. [grin]

I am just happy that there is a "hobby" that my Ma**h*** and I can do together that is fun and a great pass time. Afterall, "As long as we are safe and happy...what else is there?"
(CHEESEY, I know...I am a girl afterall...gotta have a moment ever now and then...LOL don't judge me. )[smile]
 
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