TacTissy now a DV victim

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noxin said:
This got to me. My daughter is getting to the point where she's going to start dating and if this happened to her, I'm not sure how I would handle it.
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domestic violence seems to be a learned behavior. By both the perpetrators and the victims. A girl raised in a loving family where violence is not acceptable and where she is educated to know that she should never become a victim is less likely to be a victim than a girl raised seeing it happen to others in her life. Start talking to your daughter about what is and is not acceptable behavior from men, regardless of who they are (father, uncle, boy friend, husband) and let her know you will always be there if she needs you. SOunds like a shitty subject to have to discuss with a young girl but if you don't want her to be a victim help her understand from a young age that not everyone is as kind as her dad and that you will always be there for her.
 
PennyPincher said:
domestic violence seems to be a learned behavior. By both the perpetrators and the victims. A girl raised in a loving family where violence is not acceptable and where she is educated to know that she should never become a victim is less likely to be a victim than a girl raised seeing it happen to others in her life. Start talking to your daughter about what is and is not acceptable behavior from men, regardless of who they are (father, uncle, boy friend, husband) and let her know you will always be there if she needs you. SOunds like a shitty subject to have to discuss with a young girl but if you don't want her to be a victim help her understand from a young age that not everyone is as kind as her dad and that you will always be there for her.
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Props for taking this thread in a positive direction.
 
PennyPincher said:
domestic violence seems to be a learned behavior. By both the perpetrators and the victims. A girl raised in a loving family where violence is not acceptable and where she is educated to know that she should never become a victim is less likely to be a victim than a girl raised seeing it happen to others in her life. Start talking to your daughter about what is and is not acceptable behavior from men, regardless of who they are (father, uncle, boy friend, husband) and let her know you will always be there if she needs you. SOunds like a shitty subject to have to discuss with a young girl but if you don't want her to be a victim help her understand from a young age that not everyone is as kind as her dad and that you will always be there for her.
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why do you insist on continuing to reinforce the stereotype of girl=victim boy=perpetrator
this meme you promote is harmful
 
Take 25 men and 25 women and pair them up and let them rotate through and fight. 90% of the time the guy is going to kick the shit out of the chick. Genetics.

While women may use violence to get what they want, even a larger than reported proportion of the time, the results are rarely the same.

Could society make a better effort to more fairly evaluate situations... sure. But this idea that domestic violence is equal both in frequency and severity for both men and women is utterly rediculous.

I literally am twice the size of my wife. I don't even think Id be intimidated if she had a nail-bat and I was unarmed. Meanwhile I could roll over in my sleep and kill her. Men are usually much larger, more powerful, and more resiliant to injury. Genetics.

Mike

Sent from my cell phone with a tiny keyboard and large thumbs...
 
CrazyMJB, how is your size relevant if your wife Starts punching you in the face while you are sleeping.. you seem to think domestic violence is a fight.
 
domestic violence has its root in psychological control and dominance
it doesnt start violently it may be non violent but emotionally abusive
violence happens once the victim partner believes they are trapped in and dependent upon the relationship
its not all about the physics
 
It's not necessarily about using violence to get what they want, sometimes its just retard behavior. Also guys who get hit probably allow that abuse,because they think if they hit back (or report that abuse) she'll just turn the system against them, and those guys aren't wrong. Some morons also will take abuse because theyre too lazy to make their own friggan sandwich, lol. Men stay with shitty women for a myriad of even shittier reasons.
 
drgrant said:
It's not necessarily about using violence to get what they want, sometimes its just retard behavior. Also guys who get hit probably allow that abuse,because they think if they hit back (or report that abuse) she'll just turn the system against them, and those guys aren't wrong. Some morons also will take abuse because theyre too lazy to make their own friggan sandwich, lol. Men stay with shitty women for a myriad of even shittier reasons.
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That's hilarious and true....
 
MGnoob said:
i'm not sure what this means?
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It means that I could probably kill her with one punch in her sleep and she could probably wake me up. If I so chose I could establish a dominance and power over her with my size and stature that she couldnt over me. This is often the situation in relationships with men and women. The ability to inflict damage to a point of being able to exert control over the other party is largely unequal.

There are all sorts of exceptions. This is the rule.

P.s. Im sorry your ex beat the shit out of you.

Mike

Sent from my cell phone with a tiny keyboard and large thumbs...
 
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I really didn't get what you meant, i see what your saying. The same thinking contributed me almost getting my eye completely blown out.
It's alittle tricky than how you think it is, after your intimate partner iniates such an attack i'd image you standing there just like me because i wasn't going to start punching a girl in the face.
also taking such a blow to the eye didn't seem like such a big deal till about 6 hours later when i was debating razoring my eyelid like a boxer would do.
I didn't think a girl was capable of inflicting any kind of serious injury, seeing as i've actually had the shit beaten out of me and was never phased. A black eye's no big deal... losing one is no joke.

with all this physical prowess over the opposite gender would you really beat your wife even if she hit you? i'd just leave if possible
 
Thats just it... we can leave. She cant physically block my egress...

Mike

Sent from my cell phone with a tiny keyboard and large thumbs...
 
OK, so roughly 1/3 of women will be a victim of domestic violence at some time and 1/5 of men will, at least from the studies I have seen that seem somewhat reputable. They did not really break down what percentage of the aggressors where male or female or same sex vs hetero relationships.

I still can't figure why so many guys immediately start scream foul when ever a woman starts talking about being a victim. I also have never seen a woman who off hand doubted a man's claim of domestic violence. In fact most women I have met are more compassionate to the male victims they may meet than most men are to female victims.

I do not know TacTissy at all. I have no reason to believe she is lying about anything. If she is, well far from the first person on the internet or in life to do so. Barring any evidence of her being anything but honest, why even start bashing and talking about how bad men have it? Did she in anyway claim violence against men was a wholesome and well accepted past time that should be encouraged?
 
RicoShay said:
why do you insist on continuing to reinforce the stereotype of girl=victim boy=perpetrator
this meme you promote is harmful
Click to expand...

Are you ****ing retarded .

Plain and simple more men are the attackers in dv then women. Not all the time but most of the time. It's not a myth . Most women when getting pissed off will throw or break some thing . Slap the guy .
Some men slap and beat there women near to death.

I've watched it first hand growing up. More often then not it would turn on to me and my brother.

Any kid growing up with dv and doesn't deal with it later in life will become a victim or the abuser. Speaking from first hand experience I let people walk over me at times and that's a learned trait and very hard for me to break. It takes a lot for me to stand up for my self . But if I see some one attacking some one else I defend that person with out thinking.
 
RicoShay said:
why do you insist on continuing to reinforce the stereotype of girl=victim boy=perpetrator
this meme you promote is harmful
Click to expand...

14 years bouncing in bars, I can count the number of girl-on-guy violence on one hand. Guy-on-girl? I lost count how many times I was in COURT, let alone stopping it.

18 years working in hospitals around the country as a CAT Scan/X-ray Tech, the numbers are similar, but I don't go to court or get to "educate" anybody.

You're entitled to your (delusional) opinion, as well as to be a troll. I am entitled to call you a jackass.

You're a jackass.
 
Well said Radtekk. +1
Before moving to NM I spent 33 years as a licensed social worker in MA. I've seen DV from all sides--victims, victimizers and the kids involved. By a huge %, women are usually the victims--disparity of force and an aggressive neanderthal mindset are usually on the guys side. And it is a learned behavior as it becomes the way you solve a problem, take control and assert dominance. A woman can be bad ass tough but, without a weapon, it's usually not enough.
Court records and years of experience and stats confirm it.
 
Radtekk said:
14 years bouncing in bars, I can count the number of girl-on-guy violence on one hand. Guy-on-girl? I lost count how many times I was in COURT, let alone stopping it.

18 years working in hospitals around the country as a CAT Scan/X-ray Tech, the numbers are similar, but I don't go to court or get to "educate" anybody.

You're entitled to your (delusional) opinion, as well as to be a troll. I am entitled to call you a jackass.

You're a jackass.
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i bounced at private functions not a bar (maybe it was a different type of customer) for several years and maybe 75 or 80 percent of the violence was instigated by women pushing and slapping each other and men
your entitled to your opinions and your insults i guess its the internets where the mouth can run free without fear
 
noxin said:
This got to me. My daughter is getting to the point where she's going to start dating and if this happened to her, I'm not sure how I would handle it.
Click to expand...

I'm EXACTLY sure how I would/will handle it.

richc said:
With fists, blunt objects, sharp implements and guns.
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THIS would be a good start.

Radtekk said:
14 years bouncing in bars, I can count the number of girl-on-guy violence on one hand. Guy-on-girl? I lost count how many times I was in COURT, let alone stopping it.

18 years working in hospitals around the country as a CAT Scan/X-ray Tech, the numbers are similar, but I don't go to court or get to "educate" anybody.

You're entitled to your (delusional) opinion, as well as to be a troll. I am entitled to call you a jackass.

You're a jackass.
Click to expand...

Agreed.
 
crazymjb said:
Thats just it... we can leave. She cant physically block my egress...

Mike

Sent from my cell phone with a tiny keyboard and large thumbs...
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egress from a single altercation isnt the issue, control over the relationship and egress from the relationship is the issue
see warwickbens post right below

warwickben said:
Are you ****ing retarded .

Plain and simple more men are the attackers in dv then women. Not all the time but most of the time. It's not a myth . Most women when getting pissed off will throw or break some thing . Slap the guy .
Some men slap and beat there women near to death.

I've watched it first hand growing up. More often then not it would turn on to me and my brother.

Any kid growing up with dv and doesn't deal with it later in life will become a victim or the abuser. Speaking from first hand experience I let people walk over me at times and that's a learned trait and very hard for me to break. It takes a lot for me to stand up for my self . But if I see some one attacking some one else I defend that person with out thinking.
Click to expand...
not retarded
you are arguing about the level of violence not the rate of incidence of violence which is probably similar between the sexes
 
RicoShay said:
egress isnt the issue, control over the relationship and egress from the relationship is the issue
see warwickbens post right below


not retarded
you are arguing about the level of violence not the rate of incidence of violence which is probably similar between the sexes
Click to expand...

Human nature women are less violent.
 
tactissy if she was hit by a domestic partner got not much more than what women can dish out to men
a slap a black eye a broken nose
the real damage comes not when they go their separate ways but when one feels trapped in the relationship or believes she will change and stop hitting him and doesnt leave and it escalates
 
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