Wow. I can't believe how many heart warming replies I just read on this thread. So much useful information, but I would be a terrible person to focus on myself after reading all of this.
Each and everyone of you that shared a reply with similar experience - I feel tremendously for you every minute of the day. I'm just an average kid who had it pretty easy so far in my life. Never thought this would or could happen to my family. Boy did I need a reality check, but didn't want something like this.
My mother or parent I'll say like many of your loved ones is so close to me. She's a great woman like many who hates spreading sadness. I think she hides her fear and maybe even suffering (if any). I vowed after her diagnosis to never pass by even a stranger with similar experiences. This shit is real. I can see many people severely struggling with this maybe not even during the terrible experience but years after, and once this pandemic is over I will take a hands on approach to doing my part in helping kids with cancer hopefully with volunteer services.
My parent is not old nor young but has had a good life. I can't begin to imagine what parents go through with children going through this terrible sickness.
Reading this wonderful replies helps remove the sting. Knowing that others have experienced this (unfortunately) makes me feel like I'm not on an island alone. So you shouldn't either. No matter what part of the terrible experience you're in, know that you're not alone. Please don't hesitate to PM me if you just need an outsider to talk to. I know I've looked for it & received it as I needed it. I can't imagine what it would be like to not be able to talk to someone else and feel isolated. This is not a tolerable experience for any individual.
I'm so blessed and fortunate we live here in New England near such amazing institutes and doctors. I get so frustrated as even with these hospitals they can't give you quick immediate answers, you have to be patient. Staying positive is hard but I know for their sake it's important. I'm sure later in life no matter the out come it's going to really mess with me at some point. I chose to accept this and will channel my energy to helping others as I know that's what my mom would be proud of.
I'll send her (and you) my prayers for strength and a positive outcome.
~Matt
Edit: And both of your Dads, macarry and Canndo. Surrounded by Love, families can handle anything...
Thank you so much Matt. That is so true, family bond is strong and can't be broken. I challenge those who may struggle with past connections to test this. Life is too short to be stubborn or too passive.
wishing the best for your mom macarry and your dad canndo. cancer sucks, you are right. it touches every family eventually it seems, mine sure has seen it's share.
Thanks Greencobra, I'm sorry about your experience with cancer as well. No matter the outcome, tough times don't last but tough people do.
Macarry, sorry to hear about your mother.
Yeah, life is a fragile thing.
You can have the best of health and suddenly you get hit with something like cancer and realize there isn't anything that you could have done to avoid it.
Best wishes in her fight against it.
Thank you so much oldguy, life is indeed fragile. I've learned that you can't live everyday in fear but you have to respect the possibilities and outcomes of certain situations.
Cancer is a bit** It comes or goes, takes what it wants or doesnt when it wants. You can treat it, but you can't prevent it always. Thank you, I will pass the support along to her as I know it all helps. This is such a great community.
Prayers being said. Hope for a positive outcome.
Thank you ISOTOX, hopefully I can look back on it as a nightmare, which it is. However, I'll never forget this time no matter what the outcome is. I feel for those impacted by cancer in any aspect.
Sorry to hear macarry. My Dad died of pancreatic cancer when I was 12. Back then treatment was rough. It was pretty tough on my Mom and not an easy thing to watch. My Mom fought cancer for 20 years. It started as breast cancer, Then it was cancer of the esophagus. Which eventually lead to lung cancer.
There were some tough times with Mom, but she was treated by some of the best at Dana Faber and Brigham & Woman's. There were some great times too. Weddings, Christenings, graduations, Christmas and holidays.
Get the best doctors. My wife fought tirelessly with insurance companies to make it happen and it was worth it. I think they gave in just because they were sick of listening to her. It didn't hurt that she is a Critical Care nurse at the Brigham.
Advocate. You gotta push. Don't be afraid to ask for second opinions and ask questions.
Attitude is everything. It's hard sometimes, but very important that she tries to stay positive. Fight like hell and love like crazy.
I wish you the very best. Feel free to PM me. My wife is still a nurse at the Brigham and I would be happy to ask her anything if it will help. The right doctors can make a difference. Stay strong.
I'm sorry for your loss. I know he's in a better place now and is at rest. 12 is a young age to be dealing with this. Although the pain may go away for the most part after such a loss, it stays with you I'm sure. If you ever want to talk please feel free to reach out. Treatment seems to have come along way, but of course can't always "fix" the issue(s). I feel for your mother, as everyone is battling something and to go through that situation at a high or low point in life is devastating. 20 years is a long battle. What a strong woman. My mother is also very strong. I wouldn't be half as strong as her going through this. I'm learning soft tissue sarcoma is similar as it can literally go anywhere. Fortunately, they found it on her chest, removed it (mostly). Target radiation should help, and she's doing more scans to see if it's elsewhere but they currently have no signs. Which I don't understand as she hasn't had a PET scan and may not get one for whatever reason. Googling this information is scary as hell as her cancer is so rare (soft tissue sarcoma), and the type she has (cardiac) is extra rare.....which I don't know is a good thing or bad thing. I assume bad as they haven't seen it a lot, maybe enough, but not a lot. Even on her phone calls with her doctors my mom is willing to do whatever needed to help the next person no matter the out come. Even during this terrible moment in her life, she is thinking of others. To me, that is more bada** than anything else and I know this is where my personality is from as I too am willing to always help others no matter the cost. My mother is going to the same facility here in MA. I just graduated college & am so glad to have accomplished this for her as I struggled in school and am glad I was able to finish it. It's tough getting the best care as there are so many other patients. Dana Faber is absolutely amazing though as you are cared by a team and not an individual. I too understand those insurance phone calls and feel for those who literally have to battle to be taken care of or get better care. When she was in the ICU for 1 month after having severe breathing complications due to her mass on her heart, I appreciated those in the field so much, for information but also for their efforts of helping others, paid or not I don't care. I think my mom is having a bit of a hard time self advocating and is more or less along for the ride. Also, she isn't pushing for dark/scary questions which doesn't help in general, not trying to sound selfish but sometimes I personally would rather know the likely possibilities than wonder constantly. Thank you so much, what an amazing saying "Fight like hell and love like crazy".