Seeking opinions - keeping your hobby "secret" from other parents

[tictac]

I thought of this question while posting on the trhead about how old your kid was when you first took him to the range.

My kids don't know I own firearms. My oldest will eventually find out when I take him to the range. The cat will be then out of the bag for good.

The problem is that I don't think I want him to tell his friends that I took him to the range to shoot. I think that some parents may not like the idea of me having firearms even though they are well secured at all times, and I choose not to carry. Some people just despise firearms. I don't want him to "lose" friendships because of me owning firearms.

Have any of you had similar conversations with your kids? Will it have any effect? Do you think it is better not to have it?

Thanks,

 

[Keystone]

Just my $.02...but, if you have kids, assume that they WILL find out that you have guns, and find them, and be able to access them. It's up to you to make sure that they know enough to not hurt themselves when they do find the guns.

If you don't think you can trust him to keep the secret, and you want to keep it a secret, don't take him to the range. But, see my first point.

If they don't like you having properly secured firearms...ask them about their cleaning chemicals, tools, etc. Just as dangerous, in the wrong hands, and probably overlooked.

 

[Elmer Fudd]

I would keep it quiet. I wouldn't take the kid until he's old enough to keep it quiet too. Some people react differently (and strangely) to firearms.... Imagine that you kid tells their kid about your guns. Now the other parents are potentially hearing about your guns from their kid. I can't imagine they would feel warm and fuzzy at that moment.

 

[HiggityHank]

It's VASTLY better for your child to know and understand firearms from a safety point of view than for him to have a whole boatload of ignorant anti-2a friends and live in a house with guns.

Teach them young and teach them often. Keeping them informed is how you keep accidents from happening. No matter how diligent you are in securing your firearms, a child with a near infinite amount of time and an infinite curiosity WILL find a way in. When that happens you want to have educated them to leave guns alone and get an adult. I don't know how old your kids are, but I don't think there's an age limit for this lesson or the 4 rules.

 

[crazymjb]

If I have kids spending time at a friends house I would want to know whether or not their parents are idiots, to include how they handle and treat firearms. I may be a responsible gun owner but that doesn't mean I automatically assume that everyone who owns a gun isn't a retard. Even if my kid knows basic gun safety, it doesn't mean their friend wont go to "show" them their daddy's gun and shoot my kid.

I personally wouldn't hide it. My parents were and to a degree still are the most gun-phobic people out there, and our neighbors growing up were big hunters from the mid-west and my parents knew them, knew they were safe, and had no problem letting me spend time at their house, and they are still good family friends to this day. If someones parents really are that crazy, my kid probably wouldn't need to be spending time with them anyway.

Teach your kid safety, and at the age I gather they are most important to not touch guns or be around other non-adults touching guns.

Mike

 

[bpm990d]

I may be a responsible gun owner but that doesn't mean I automatically assume that everyone who owns a gun isn't a retard.

Someone has to be shooting all those street signs during hunting season. The gun owning community at large has plenty of problem children. All you have to do is go on YouTube and watch most of the videos.

B

 

[KBCraig]

This concept is just utterly foreign to me. Of course, I come from a culture where it's assumed every house contains at least one firearm, even if they're not a "pro-gun" household.

The only conversation I ever had with my kids about gun ownership, was to tell them that how many or what kinds of guns we owned, or especially where those guns are, was something they should never discuss with classmates.

I wasn't worried about my kids, nor even their friends, but word does tend to get around, and I didn't want some friend of a friend of a friend's casual buddy who overheard something, breaking into my house.

Tonight, the second night of serious weather emergencies and tornadoes all around us, I decided to get out of my casual wear and get dressed as if we might need to bug out of the house in a hurry. Jeans, t-shirt, shoes, and my OWB .45 rig. My 8 year old son asked, "Dad, why did you put those magazines and gun on your belt?" (Yes, my 8yo knows the proper usage of "magazine". )

While I was drawing a breath to answer, my 21 year old daughter replied, "Because when there's a storm and the power is out, sometimes bad people try to take advantage, and he wants to keep us safe."

Without missing a beat, 8yo Son said, "Well, of course it's natural that criminals use the cover of darkness, so I'm glad Dad can protect us."

Literally. That's a direct quote. And the "natural that criminals use the cover of darkness" line just reflects his amazing level of literacy, thanks to home-schooling.

And I'm proud of BabyGirl for knowing exactly why I "got dressed".

 

[mogarbage]

Someone has to be shooting all those street signs during hunting season.

Who needs to wait for stop sign season?



eta:
Having been raised in the midwest, the only shame or reason to hang your head low was if you didn't have a whitetail hanging in your front yard during deer season. I know, gasp, guns AND hunting!

 

[Jose]

This concept is just utterly foreign to me.

+1

I cannot fathom living like a criminal, hiding something perfectly normal from lunatics.

It's like falling into the rabbit hole.

titac I think you should continue to wring your hands, let others opinions rule you, and hide everything from your kid.

 

[rattletrap1970]

I'm not ashamed of shooting and I'll be damned if I'm going to lead some kind of apologetic life because some moonbat asswipe decided to spawn. If I had kids and his/her friends parents were staunch anti gun, my kid wouldn't hang with them.. That's all. I personally wouldn't wan't the idiot families values rubbing off on my kid. Worth losing a friendship over? Yup.

 

[ScottS]

Yeah, I'm not sure I'm getting this, either.

I don't start every conversation with someone I meet by saying, "Hi, I'm Scott. I have many guns," but I don't hide it or deny it if someone asks. I'm assuming they're legally owned, so why are you so ashamed? It's not like you're worried about your kid finding your meth lab, for Christ's sake.

It does beg the question, if you have to worry about your "friends" deserting you if they find out you have legally-owned firearms, as does...what? 60% of American households?...why exactly are they "friends," again?

ETA: if you were discussing this from a security standpoint, i.e. you don't want the kids running to school and mentioning your "arsenal" to some random low-life, then I could understand your reluctance.

 

[jenlynn724]

I have never hid the fact that we have firearms from the kids. I'm pretty sure the kids don't discuss guns with their friends, because it is nothing special to them. To them the guns have always been there, kind of like furniture.

 

[PCK9]

The Hell with what other people think! Do what you want you think is the right.

 

[Squished]

Yawn. The mere concept of having to keep a constitutional right secret because you're worried about what others think of you really makes me sick. Screw the other people, if they are that worried they shouldn't be a friend of yours or associated with. No need to give into the sheep.

 

[Dench]

I think the entire act of keeping your guns quiet is what put this state in the position that it seems to be finally crawling away from.

The more people that know guns are in good hands means the faster the sheep will eventually see that more then criminals and police commonly have firearms.

 

[EddieCoyle]

My kids know to keep their mouths shut about what I have and don't have. Not just guns.

 

[Fitz]

Daughter's 9. Son's 3. Both know that there's guns in the house; both know the location of the safe where they're kept locked up. Josh knows to call an adult and not touch it if he sees one laying around. Emilie knows the typical rules of gun handling but has not been to the range with me just yet. She knows how to check and see if it's clear but isn't strong enough to manipulate the slide by herself.

Of the parents we've met, none have been skeezed out yet that we've seen and their kids manage to find their way back here fairly routinely. Fork, spoon, knife, gun, broom. They're all simple tools that are used for different things. None of them are more or less evil than the other.

Fitz

 

[kiver]

My daughter would much rather talk about horses

 

[Conservativegirl]

We've never hidden the fact that we have guns from our kids. They've always known that they were there and were always taught gun safety. Also,
whenever they've asked if they could see one or hold one we immediately got one and let them. After awhile they stopped asking because it was no big deal. But, they have always been under strict orders to never, ever mention it at school. Schools have a zero tolerance policy. All you need is for some idiot to overhear and say that they heard your child talking about guns and suddenly it gets turned into something sinister.

 

[edhead35]

I don't want him to "lose" friendships because of me owning firearms.

Unfortunately, this will be a reality he must learn to fully understand the difference between sheep and wolves, and understand all aspect of firearm ownership. I am nearly 30, and recently have had people say they will no longer come to my house, nor let me in their house without a pat down. I haven't seen those people since, nor do I care to.

I do not have children, but when I do, my firearm ownership will only be the business of who I decide to make it their business. If my children can't keep the secrets of the family, then they will not have proven to be mature enough to handle and shoot my guns. I will not announce my ownership to other parents, but if they ask I would assure them that everything is secure, and their child will not have access to my firearms.

As a whole, I only know a few whacko moonbats. Aside from them, even the run of the mill liberals are curious about guns, and seem to want to learn to shoot, and I have had great success in converting their opinions.

 

[Kicker96FS]

I think you are wrong. Kids need to learn about guns, properly, that means shooting them, cleaning them, how to handle, etc.

Shooting guns is COOL to kids! What make you think they are not want to tell their friends that you took him/her shooting!? They will be full of envy!

It's what YOU teach them that will make them responsible shooters. or not. If they loose some friends because you have guns in the house, then that is not you kids loss, it's the friends loss and you have to tell them that.

Another words, let you kids decide if they want to tell their friends or not, they should have an idea on how they may react.

Keeping secrets about something you love is stupid, you don't have to hand a sign around your neck either, know what I mean?

 

[Kicker96FS]

My kids know to keep their mouths shut about what I have and don't have. Not just guns.

Oh? So what are you not telling us?

 

[Boris]

... I don't want him to "lose" friendships because of me owning firearms. ...

at that age (presume less than teen), back at home, having firearms would get 10x more friends. Kids don't go all moonbat until much later in life. When I was ... well still now, we all think that firearms are awesome. If your kid has friends that were born moonbat, he doesn't need those loosers. "Tell me who your friends are and I'll tell you who you are" (or something like that)

 

[Rob Boudrie]

There are gun owners who represent the shooting community positively and those who don't. If those of us who are decent people (employed, non-criminals, don't beat the spouse, etc.) feel the need to "hide" all it does is increase the percentage of asshat gun owners in the public's perception.

I had one parent express concern when my kid was younger. No big deal - I offered a tour of the ordnance room to show him the guns were properly secured (this was pre 1998 before this was required), and the concern evaporated. If it did not, I would have learned I was dealing with an irrational individual - and I don't feel the need to guide my life based on what irrational people might think.

Yes, shooting is cool for kids - but I wouldn't take a kid under 18 shooting without talking to his/her parents first unless it was part of an organized outing where it was obvious that the parents knew shooting was involved. It's just a matter of respecting the rights of other parents. Once the kid is 18, they get treated as an adult.

 

[Jose]

My daughter would much rather talk about horses

+1

 

[CRSIII]

My kids seem to grasp and understand the element of surprise.

 

[Jose]

I don't want him to "lose" friendships because of me owning firearms.

"Friends" like that are not worth having

 

[MisterHappy]

My kids have been going to shooting events from <1 yo. Dad shoots. That's the way it is.

When my older boy was in preschool, they did a pasta scuplture. His was titled, "A Big Gun Shooting Place With Many Different Guns."

The pre-school director mentioned it to me. "Well, that's where he was over the weekend." End of discussion.

There's nothing wrong with it. I tell the kids, "Don't go around shouting, 'I shoot guns!' but don't deny it." My younger wears (proudly) shirts from Clubs he's visited, Crushing Clays, and State Shoots. His friends know. He's invited most of them to the range.

The kids will know, and will talk. Just make sure that they understand that you're safe, and teach them to be safe too.

Oh, as for the "ask them about the cleaning chemicals...." with an Anti, that won't fly - that stuff is different, as it's not Icky Guns (tm).

 

[pernox]

Kid's been taught to parrot the "yes, my Daddy likes to shoot even though he doesn't hunt yet" line if it comes up. Nothing more, because as mentioned, my concern is burglary rather than what a pants-wetting lunatic thinks of myself or my daughter. She's got several classmates who take time off school in the morning during the various seasons to hunt with their dads, and the second grade teacher brought venison meatballs her husband made for the kids to try before Thanksgiving. To me, one of the most important things we can do as parents is to teach our kids how to operate the guns, where they're kept, proper handling, and what happens when their projectiles hit something. Not a day goes by that my kid doesn't see me handling a carry piece, cleaning a rifle, etc.

A friend that bags your kid because you're a gun guy isn't worth having, IMHO, and your child will be better off without.

 

[Diskothek]

When I was 7 or 8 my dad (retired LEO) did the right thing (IMO) and showed me his service pistol and let me hold it. I knew where it was in the house, but at that age you know kids are somewhat intrigued by them, and even moreso if they didn't even know it was in the house. But after holding it as an 8 year old I was just like "jeez this things heavy" and thought nothing more of it. You don't want curiosity killing the cat, and much less so your kid.